Adult ADD and Relationships

Tess Thompson

Patients with symptoms of adult attention deficit disorder are often bored with monotonous and repetitive tasks. They also have problems with organization and planning. The most common trait that has been observed is postponement of tasks that need immediate attention, even at the risk of suffering a loss, monetary or otherwise. College students have trouble in focusing on lectures and completing their assignments in time. As adults with ADD are mostly impulsive too, this often leads to monetary issues, which is one of the main reasons for a broken romantic relationship or a troubled relationship with others.

Problems with relationships transpire mostly because the frustration and anger in those with symptoms of adult attention deficit disorder cools off as easily as it occurs. While others carry the hurt and anger after the event or argument, the ADD adult is left wondering what happened and why others are still annoyed. In addition, they are termed as egotistic and immature since they are incapable of following up on commitments.

Once an individual has been diagnosed with and is on adult ADD medication, it is vital that the family has a proper and extensive understanding of the diagnoses and how the behaviors related with ADD can affect the entire family. The family may be required to deal with conditions like depression, anxiety, over indulgence in alcohol and other conditions that manifest due to the prevalence of ADD.

If one of the two adults in a married relationship exhibits ADD symptoms, it is important that both are susceptible to each other’s weaknesses and strengths in order to enable the relationship to fructify and evolve positively. In such cases both spouses become supplementary to each other; one of them has periods of spontaneity and the other acts like a stabilizer.

In cases where the non-ADD spouse fails to appreciate the procrastination and other inabilities of the ADD spouse as being medical conditions, the ADD spouse often resorts to strange behaviors in search of novel situations. Such behaviors often manifest in the form of over spending and extra marital affairs.

Most likely, once treatment of ADD starts, couples tend to expect miracles from the cure, forgetting that adult ADD medication takes time to cure and may even lead to certain temporary side effects. This leads to negating the efforts already made toward nurturing relationships with ADD patients. For this purpose, family or couples therapy has to be a central part of the overall treatment. It is imperative to remember that it takes a long time to cultivate adult ADD relationships and it may take an equally long time to make long-term changes.

Adult ADD may be an explanation, but that does not mean it can be made into an excuse. Instead, if an effort is made to comprehend the strengths and weaknesses, it may lead to managing the condition successfully and help in developing strategies to convert those very symptoms to an advantage.

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